For many years I have been surrounded, both in my private life and professionally, by women committed to the issue of gender discrimination. The respect and esteem I have for them led me to want to question myself as a man. That’s how a journey began, which encountered an apparently counter-intuitive obstacle in my desire to “understand”:

I do not deny that, at times, it has been and still is difficult for me to accept not understanding the other person, and in particular a person of the female gender, a woman. I have already said elsewhere that I am a sexist, aware of being so and committed to a path of emancipation from stereotypes about myself, about the male gender and about the female gender. So it happens that I make jokes or have sexist remarks, sometimes unintentionally, sometimes because I find them funny. It also happens that a person, a woman, points out to me that I have been inappropriate or have hurt her feelings. It is in these cases that, if I do not understand the reasons or the point of view of the person pointing out my misstep, I struggle to accept it and inside myself (sometimes even explicitly) I sigh.

But then I realize that if I want to break free from a culture of stereotypes, this is exactly where I have to start: there is no right or wrong, but only the subjective truth of those who experience those words or hear that joke. My job is not to understand, or worse, to judge whether it is a legitimate observation, but to listen, accept, and apologize, because “there is nothing to understand“.

Paolo Lanciani

What is the Billy Elliot Project?

Workshops and residential seminars for male leaders who want to seize the opportunity and responsibility to become promoters of an organizational and professional culture oriented towards diversity and inclusion.
We are convinced that male leaders, first and foremost, can strongly influence their organizations by promoting cultural change, valuing the uniqueness of each individual.
With this project, we go beyond stereotypes about ourselves and beyond gender, age, race, personal traits, and the characteristics of others.

Download the project presentation

For more information, contact our partners directly Paolo Lanciani and Davide Motta.